Love her or lose her. 

It's that simple. 

Not at all

Months have passed since you and I decided to seperate our ways. You may not notice it, but I was in deep pain when that happened. I just chose to be strong infront of everyone most especially, infront of you. I did cope up with this dramatic point of my life. I actually felt like I was really ready to let go of everything that we had by loving someone else. We had our moments that made me realize more that we are not really for each other because if we are, I would not really find this kind of happiness once again with someone else other than you. 

I enjoyed his company. He made me feel that I'm always a priority. He gives all his attention just to make sure I am actually being loved. I was happy though sometimes we fight because of you and his ex. It's just really inevitable. 

Then one day, you came across my mins and started to ask someone how you were. Then.. Things have changed. I knew that you are on that part of moving on as well. You are trying to give your attention to someone else now and honestly, I felt like a huge part of my heart just go away from me. I remember when I always tell you that I'm going to be the happiest when I see you moving on from our relationship-- from me. I always pray to God to give you the strength everyday and for you to find happiness again. That's the least I could do for breaking your heart. 

Then, she came into your life. I really thought that I could happily accept the fact and the idea of you being with someone new.. But I was totally wrong. Even if months have passed now, I could tell that I'm really not ready to gaze my eyes (even if it's just on the internet/photo) of you and another girl. It's just so hard for me to look at cause reality's always taking me back to the time when you were still trying to pursue back my heart. From now on, I'll always wonder "what if I gave you another chance to prove yourself? What if I just accepted you again in my life?" What difference could it make?

Months have passed but I still can't forsee you with some other girl. I really thought that my heart and mind was already strong enough to look at that view-- but I was wrong. Cause even though someone turned the world upside down, I always know that i'm not ready yet.. Not at all.