Excitement kills (2 days late post)

Ngayon andito lang ako sa bistro for a project. At medyo malungkot ako ngayon. Hahaha. Masama pala pag masyado kang naexcite sa isang bagay eh noh? Kadalasan talaga hindi natutuloy. Hahaha. Anyway, ayun nga. Kagabi palang sobrang excited na ako kasi lalabas at manonood kami sine nina Maine, Pat (her guy) at siya sana. Double date! Pero ayun, mga an hour ago, nalaman kong hindi siya matutuloy. Pinarinig niya sakin yung conversation nilang magkakapatid kay tita. Honestly, naawa ako kay tita at sobrang naiintindihan ko siya. Dun palang nafeel ko na na hindi na siya tuloy. I was thinking to hold him back from not going but I just let it go. Hindi nga naman talaga maganda sa feeling yung after ka sabihan ng magulang mo eh makukuha mo pang mag white lie. Haha. Ayuuun. 

So hindi parin siya talaga tuloy ngayon. Pero ayos lang, naiintindihan ko naman yun. Basta next time, bawal na maging sobrang excited! HAHAHA. 

Open when

So yep, I'm planning to give him something before my 6 months internship in New York.

Letter na mayrong mga "open when". Got this idea from 9gag. It may be common or what (I honestly don't know) but I really think it's a nice gift.

I'm going to write him 14 letters. Because that's my fav number. I'm gonna write it handwritten on the actual gift. So here it goes,
 

---------///------///------///------------

Open when.. You received your gift (NOW) 

Hi ming! This is my special gift for you. I know it's not that great. Haha. I'm not gonna be around for a while and you know that I'm not gonna be able to answer your texts or calls like I used to. That's why I prepared this for you. :). 

So here's the rule. You shouldn't be opening these letters  UNLESS you don't exactly feel that way. Madali lang intindihin to ming. :). Happy reading!!

1.) Open when.. You miss me

Awww you've been missing me, huh? Well Imissyoutoo! I always do, baby. Even when I do all these kitchen work here in Ny, I always think about you. But you know what? I'm not that depressed or something about it. Maybe a little, but not  that much because I know that as each day passes, it's getting nearer to the the day that we'll be seeing each other again. :). I can't wait for that day, ming! I just hope everything's still alright by the time I go back. :). So yep, Imissyoutoo ming! Don't be sad now, alright? I'll be back very soon. :). Iloveyou! <3.  

2.) Open when.. You need to know how much Iloveyou

Hindi pa ba obvious ming? Hahaha. Actually, words can't really describe how much I love you, ming. Pero kung ipipilit natin.. Well, iloveyou very much. You know that. I could wait a thousand years and find myself still wanting you. Haha. Too good to be true, right? Well that's what I feel. Iloveyouverymuch ming and don't get insecure or something sa mga lalake dyan. Para sakin, ikaw ang the best of all the best. :). Simula nameet kita, sarado na puso ko. Hindi pa nagiging tayo, loyal na ako sayo. Ikaw, hindi man naging ganon sakin, I accept you because I know you love me, too. Iloveyou! At wag na wag mong iisipin na hindi, okay? Iloveyou! <3. 

3.) Open when.. There are moods you just can't handle. 

It's okay, ming. Breathe in, breathe out. That's nothing. That's just temporary. Look, you'll be smiling after less than 5 minutes. Hahaha! Don't stress yourself too much! Hindi rin bagay sayo yang ganyan galit at wala sa mood. I've always known you being a happy go lucky guy and always positive. :). Just be who you are. Pero kung talagang masyado kang nasstress dyan sa pinagdadaanan mo ngayon, ilol mo nalang yan or ipokemon. Or you could talk to me if you want. I'm always ready to listen, ming. :). So yep, cheer up, now!!! Iloveyou! <3. 

4.) Open when.. You've forgotten how strong you are 

So you feel weak right now? Hey, that's not my Nigel. Everytime you fail, I know you always find a way how to get back up. Like on this relationship, you failed once, right? But you managed to get back up and proved to me how really strong you are. Ganon lang din gawin mo. Just be patient, baby. Yang mga pinagdadaanan mo ngayon, whether sa studies yan, sa family, sa friends or even sakin, I know you'll pass through it all. Don't forget to pray to God. I know that He wants you to know that whatever problems come your way, it's there for a reason. You'll always learn something from it ming. :). Wag na wag mo iisiping mahina ka kasi hindi, ming. You're the strongest person I know. You just know how to get back on the road again. Proven and tested. Iloveyou! <3. 

5.) Open when.. You're feeling down

Cheer up! Smile! Lilipas din yan ming. Don't be too hard on yourself. Let it go, let it go.. Can't hold it back anymoreee. Let it go, let it go~ Hahahaha. Let it go nalang ming. If you think you've done something wrong, than say sorry. There's nothing more meaningful than admitting your mistakes. :). But if you know you didn't do anything wrong, then relaaaax. You're fine, baby. :). Also if you feel down, don't hesitate to call me! Facetime tayo kahit nasa work ako. Hahahahaha. Chos. Pero ayun, you can always open up to me. Or better yet, don't make it a big deal nalang. Kilala kita, ganon ka naman talagang tao eh so wag mo hahayaan maging sagabal sayo yang problema mo ngayon o yang kinalulungkot mo. :). It's not the end of the world ming. Iloveyou! <3. 

6.) Open when.. We get into a big fight

You know I only get mad when you give me a reason to be so. Pero ayun, always remember that I just get into these fights because either I'm jealous or insecure or I feel that I am being ignored or rejected. I'm sorry. Sobrang sensitive ko rin kasi kaya nag-aaway tayo ng ganto. Pero ayun, don't ever think na gusto ko ng hiwalayan sa mga away natin ha! Tsssl. Kahit sinabi ko, wag. I'm sure hindi ko meant yun. I just said that out of anger or something. So yep, we'll be okay soon. I know. :). Iloveyou! <3.  

7.) Open when.. You are worried about me

Honestly? Well, I'm not that okay because I've been missing you a lot. Sana kasi may teleport nalang talaga eh. Kahit every night lang before ako matulog ikaw magteleport dito, okay na yun. Haha! Pero pwera dun, I'm okay! Dami lang work dito pero okay lang talaga ako. Sus, lilipas din ang panahon at malalagpasan din lahat to. XD. About sa feelings ko sayo, I know okay parin to. Strong parin. Hahaha. Hindi naman magbabago yun ming eh. :). So stop worrying about me alright? I'm just fine and I'll be coming back home soon! Iloveyou! <3. 

8.) Open when.. You feel like you're not handsome

Hey, now. Don't ever think about that! You don't need to feel like that cause you're a very handsome guy. For me, you're perfect, ming. :). Tsaka hindi mo kailangan mainsecure sa mga yun. Walang wala naman yun sa looks ming eh. Importante kung ano ka inside. :). Pero kahit anong mangyare, perfect ka parin talaga para sakin. Mapalooks man or ugali. Iloveyou! <3. 

9.) Open when.. You feel like giving up on us (I'm hoping you won't ever open this letter)

Hey. Why ming? Hmm. Maybe wala nga talagang forever sa mundong to. Na kahit gano pa karami yung mga pinagdaanan natin eh nagiging option parin talaga yan. Don't worry, I'm gonna be alright. Diba nga ineexpect ko na rin naman na mangyayari to? Diba nga alam mo naman na hindi na talaga ako naniniwala sa forever na yan. Haha. XD. If hindi mo pa sinasabi sakin, better tell me now ming. Walang mangyayari kung hindi ka magsasalita. Mas magiging masakit lang para sakin kung papatagalin mo pa. :). Don't be afraid. You know that I appreciate truth than sugar coated lies. :). Tell me now ming. Message me or something. It's okay, let it all out. Tell me you don't love me anymore. Tell me everything. :). 

10.) Open when.. It's our 2nd anniversary ! Wee!

Happy 2nd anniversary ming! Grabe, 2 years na tayo. I'm very happy because someone stayed with me for this long. Never ko naisip na may magmamahal sakin ng ganto katagal. :). Thank you for everything ming! Thank you for making me happy whether you know it or not. Hehehe. Thank you for always keeping up with me. Medyo mahirap kaya ako mahalin ming. Kasi sobrang sensitive and paranoid ko. I'm sorry for that ming. But believe me, I'm always trying to change. Para rin hindi na tayo palagi nag-aaway. :)). Hm. I hope for more years for us ming! Gusto ko aabot tayo ng 10 years!!! Hahaha. 10 years muna para hindi ka malula. XD. Always know that Iloveyouverymuch and I'll try to stay with you for as long as I can. :). Hindi man tayo magkasama sa 2nd anniversary natin, masaya parin ako kasi alam ko na andyan lang naman ako sa <3 mo. And ikaw, palagi ka lang din andito. :). Iloveyou! <3. 

11.) Open when.. Stressed ka na sa Internship mo. 

There's always a reason why things get rough ming. Wag ka panghinaan ng loob about sa pagiging intern. You're stronger than you know. If you think gumagapang ka sa pagiging intern mo then take action para mag improve ka. Focus lang ming. Kung kaya, mag-aral ka. Discover new things that will help you get through. Wag mong hayaan na diyan ka lang. Always go an extra mile. Or better yet, wag mo nalang masyado isipin kasi lalo ka lamg talaga masstress niyan. Itulog o ikain mo nalang yan ming! Hahaha! Gaya nga ng parati kong sinasabi, lilipas din yan. :). And.. Don't forget to pray. I swear mas nakakagaan sa pakiramdam yun. You can always talk to Him ming. :). Atsaka wag ka mag-alala ming, onting push nalang ggraduate ka na rin naman. Don't give up. :). Atsaka nakasupport lang naman palagi family mo para sayo. Gawin mo silang inspiration ming. Sila nga kaya magwork hard para sainyo diba? Edi ikaw din, kaya mo rin yan. :). Konti nalang ming graduate ka na! Push lang! Iloveyou! <3. 

12.) Open when.. You achieved something legen-- wait for it, --DARY!

Congrats ming! You deserve it! If about lol yan, well.. Magaling ka naman talaga ming. Para sakin eh LoL lord ka talaga. Hahaha. Naka abot ka na ba ng challenger? Kung oo, woow. Nakakabelib   . Galing galing ng ming ko. XD. Pero kung about naman yan sa internship mo.. Ganon rin, super congrats! Kelangan mo ko ilibre pag nakauwi ako ha!? Tsaka ayun, your cs once told me na magaling ka naman talaga ming pagdating sa internship mo. Sabi niya sakin, masipag ka raw tsaka magaling talaga. Syempre as a girlfriend, naging proud ako dun. :). Pero ayun, kung about sa ibang bagay pa yan, hahahaha. Well I'm happy you're happy. XD. Iloveyou! <3. 

13.) Open when.. It's our monthsary. :)

Happy xx month, Ming! Ekis man yang numbers na yan, pero alam kong matagal na tayo. We've come a long way and I'm proud of it. Habang mas tumatagal tayo, mas lalo akong naniniwala ulit sa forever. Na baka nga may ganon pa. :). Happy monthsary baby! Iloveyou! <3.

14.) Open when.. I'm on my way home. 

All I want to say is that.. I'm really really really excited to see you Ming!!!! After al these months, masaya akong makikita ko ulit yung love ko. :). Iloveyou! <3. 

100 things

100 Things That I Want To Do In My Lifetime

Wrote this two years ago (i guess). Hehe. Happy that i've actually did some of it already. ❤️ well for the others, hahahaha. Who knows maybe one day. :). (except with the flying part of course)

1.) Go to another country with my family. Yes, I have never experienced that. 

2.) Play Table Tennis with my friends. I miss playing that sport!

3.) Watch the sunset with my love one. I have never seen the beautiful scenery of sunset in my life.

4.) Make my parents happy, always. By the time they grow old, I want to be there for them and make them feel that I’m their daughter no matter what.

 

5.) Go to many places with my boyfriend! I’ve always wanted to share new experiences with him.

6.) Have a pet cat. A Persian or a Siamese cat will do.

7.) Late night walks in Tagaytay. 

8.) Be a Chef and cook for my family and love ones. I want to hear them say that my food was good! (HAHAHA)

9.) Dance like there’s no tomorrow. Sometimes, I just want to stay alone in a dance studio and choreograph my own moves. That would be fun.

10.) Bring out my singing “skills” in public. I can sing too, but not as good as my twin sister for sure.

11.) Zip Line. I’ve tried that once and I want to try it again! It’s fun!

12.) Eat Bacsilog ALL DAY, literally. One of my favourite foods on earth!

13.) Eat at Mang Inasal in one week every lunch time. I can pretty much live with that because it’s one of my favourite foods too.

 

14.) Go to Korea. I’m a huge kpop fan and I want to see my biases there.  ( biases - term for your favourite kpop artists)

15.) Fill up my bed with stuff toys. I may be eighteen but my heart will always be just like a six-year-old when it comes to stuff toys. :3

16.) Conquer my fear in Injections, but it seems I’m also afraid of doing that. 

17.) Play jack stones with my friends. HAHA. I know it sounds childish but I love that game!

18.) HS Reunion. I really miss my high school friends.

19.) Random phone calls with my boyfriend just to say hi and ask how each other’s days are. 

20.) Go to Singapore! I always wanted to go there because of its respectful environment.

21.) Save money for the poor. I’m the kind of person who can’t stand poor people asking for money, especially when they’re old. 

 

22.) Worship God every Sunday with my family. I miss those days. 

23.) Carnival Date. Since I was a kid I really wanted to experience one. That’s the reason why my boyfriend and I already talked about what to do on out first anniversary.. EK! <3

24.) Ride a horse in Baguio. When I was a kid, I really liked horses!

25.) Overnight with my best friends in the world (High school, College, Kpop).

26.) Represent my college on something I’m good at. I want people to know my worth somehow. :D

27.) Play volleyball with my high school co-varsities. I miss playing volleyball! I don’t even know if I can still serve and toss. HAHA.

28.) Dance with my sisters on stage. I really admire the fact that my sisters and I share the same interest in dancing.

29.) Have a walkathon from lrt Baclaran station to Monumento with my Appa. We always wanted to do that.

30.) Watch movies with my boyfriend all day.  My father’s a collector of DVDs. That should do.

31.) Have my own room. Everything will be colour PINK for sure. HAHA.

32.) Joyride with my college friends and drive to different provinces! 

33.) Make an Egg Sandwich with my Appa and eat it together. We always wanted to do due to schedule conflicts, we still couldn’t.

34.) Sleep 24 hours straight if possible. I’m a certified bed lover. 

35.) Date with my Parents. I want to see them talk again. The last time they talked, I was still a toddler. 

36.) Have a perfect marriage. I always wanted to be on a beautiful wedding dress and feel that it’s my day. <3 

37.) Photo shoot.  I’m not that pretty but I wanted to have one.

38.) Be a famous freestyle dancer. I wanted to be the kind of dancer who can dance with no scripted moves.

39.) Write essays that will be published in newspapers that could be seen by many people. When I was in high school, I was really into writing.

40.) Holiday vacation in Batangas City. That’s where our favourite cousin lives. 

41.) Shopping with Daddy and my sisters. Daddy never tipids when it comes to our clothing and other needs.

42.) Have a music video together with my twin sister. HAHA

43.) Kiss in the rain. I just see that in movies and I wanted to experience that because for me, it’s sweet. 

44.) Eat expensive doughnuts. I believe the expensive ones are the best ones.

45.) Club party with my college friends. They are really fun to be with when it comes to clubs! 

46.) Be a perfect mother for my future children. 

47.) Have my own house and lot. I know things will not be that difficult if you have your own house.

48.) Go to Paris with my sister, Danice. She always wanted to go there and I want to be the first person to see her smile once that happened.

49.) Be surprised. I love surprises from my loved ones!

50.) Ice skating with my boyfriend’s family! Almost all of them haven’t experienced ice skating and I want to be there by the time they do.

51.) Watch atleast 300-500 movies before I die. Yes, I love watching movies!

52.) Surprise a friend when its his/her birthday. I’ve always wanted to see the smile in his/her face when I did! 

53.) Eliminate snatchers all over the Philippines. They are the reason why parents are strict on night outs.

54.) Experience the No Lights Day. I want to see all the earth’s light out and look up the sky to see the stars. <3

55.) Have my own restaurant with my original menu. I want people to eat my dish and love it!

56.) Graduate in CSB. I’m sure that would make my parents proud.

57.) Have my own car. It’s convenient, safe and I can go to any place I want! I always wanted to travel to faraway places with my boyfriend.

58.) Draw. When I was a kid, I really have a passion for drawing and I want to try it out again.

59.) Have an Iphone 5. I own an iphone 4 right now and I want to upgrade it to an iphone 5. More apps for me!

60.) Be a leader. Since then, I really don’t have the potential of being a leader. I wonder how it feels like when I did.

61.) Cuddle under the stars. Again, I just see these scenarios on movies and I wanted to experience one someday. I know it would be fun.

62.) Have a full body massage after Gym. Surely one of the best feelings ever.

63.) Eat to all branches of Mang Inasal! Food trip all the way!

64.) Watch “Titanic” in a theatre. That would be more realistic and emotional for sure.

65.) Read the “Hunger Games” book. I found the movie very nice and I know the book is even nicer.

66.) Go to Hong Kong Disneyland with my family. We’ve been planning for that for how many years now.

67.) OJT in New York for 6 months. Since I enrolled in Benilde and got oriented about that New York thing, it never left my mind and set to pursue it as a Culinary Arts student.

68.) Renovate my own room. I wanted to design my own room someday.

69.) Try to eat at least 10 exotic foods from our country. That would be fun!

70.) Try at least 1 food specialty of all the countries in the world. I would like to try to eat different cuisines.

71.) Watch my all-time favourite movies in one day. I want to bring back memories.

72.) Teach young children how to cook. When I finished pursuing my dream as a chef, I will share my knowledge to young minds.

73.) Be a choreographer of any dance troupe. I want to share my own moves and styles in dancing.

74.) Have an eye laser for better eyesight. I’m just too tired of wearing contact lenses already.

75.) Have good grades all throughout my college life. I want to make my parents proud by showing them how high my grades are!

76.) Have a business that would really help my family though I’m just a teenager. I want to help them as soon as possible so that they could rest already.

77.) Buy myself the nicest pair of wedges! I’ve always wanted a very high, pink wedge.

78.) Finish a cross stitch all by myself. It’s hard work but it’s totally worth it!

79.) Do not eat for one day and eat as many as I can the other day. HAHA. I know it’s not healthy.

80.) Take silly pictures with my friends and have the guts to post it on facebook! Friends are still your craziest companions in this world. <3

81.) Finish this assignment. It’s making me crazy.

82.) Actually see a shooting star and wish for something that will come true the other day. That would be awesome!

83.) Debut party again. Me and my twin sister's debut is one of the most unforgettable event of our lives.

84.) Have a pet dog. Either a Pomeranian or a shiatsu.

 

85.) Make ELFinity recognized by our idols, Super Junior. 

86.) Withstand 100 flying cockroaches inside a glass box within 10minutes. I am really afraid of flying cockroaches.

87.) Withstand butterflies inside our house. Sometimes, butterflies just came in our house and I want not to scream or panic. I know they are good creatures. 

88.) Heart to heart talk with myself.

 

89.) Clean the entire house all by myself. I am a clean addict and doing that will help me feel relaxed.

90.) Laugh all day long with my friends. Laughter is the best medicine for a broken or worried heart.

91.) Attend a prayer meeting and lead. That would make me a more confident person.

92.) Sing in church once again. I realy miss worshipping God.

93.) Be a model of facial product  because many says that my skin is fair. HAHA.

94.) Swim in an infinity pool for one day. I would like to stay and look at the view and daydream about many things.

95.) Tricycle ride from Laguna to Batangas City. That would be very windy, but fun!

96.) Try to drink sleeping pills for long hours of sleep. HAHA. I’m sleep addict, remember?

97.) This is not realistic but I want to be able to fly someday, like a bird. I wonder how it feels like to see the view from above.

98.) Enchanted Kingdom with my closest friends on earth! 

99.) Bungee Jump from the highest mountain ever! That would be super awesome!

100.) Be with God, my family, and my friends always.

Something on valentines day

I'm planning to give him something for valentines day. 

I'm still thinking about it cause I guess it's a little hard. I know i should've given it to him few months ago but I just can't. Well I mean whole-heartedly. 

These past few days, because of my shitty pre-period hormones, I tend to always make a fight with him for stupid reasons. So stupid that I even hate myself after those fights. Mostly, trust issues. Yep, I could see that he always tries to understand me no matter what and I love him even more for that. He even says "sorry" even if I'm the one who should've said it. That's why I think it's not bad to give it a try. And yes, I really think he deserves this.

And that's a big portion of my TRUST. 

I will try my very best to control my feelings and emotions. I'll trust you even more ming. I promise I will do my best. I'm not going to complain or anything. I'll make a pact for you. 

Hope you'll li-- hope you'll feel it. Happy valentines. ❤️

Just photos

Recent photos. 

I just find it amazing how often we see each other these past few weeks. ☺️