Crying right now. Nakakainis naman kasi siya, di siya nagrereply o sumasagot sa mga tawag ko. Di ko alam kung bakit hindi ko siya kayang intindihin ngayon if ever he fell asleep. Hindi lang kasi ako mapakali na ganon yung last text niya sabay hindi na magrereply. Parang nang-iwan lang siya sa ere.
DAY 2 isn't very good.
Thursday, June 21, 2012
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
Finally, it happened. He's now officially mine. ❤
Sorry for a day late post.
At last! Him and I are official! I'm so happy because many were happy for us. I could say that we have build a good foundation before we reach at this point. He actually waited for me for a year and almost 6 months (5 months and 18 days to be exact). I know it wasn't hard for him to wait because i also have showed him what I truly feel towards him, and it was all positive.
Yesterday, nagdecide na akong sagutin siya. It was actually planned last week pa. I know that 18 would be a great number for our relationship, my mom said so too. She said that in our number, which is 18, I will be the one who would make the relationship go further because of my patience and attitude. Of course, I don't want to let my mother down and will try to prove that this relationship will last with me, being matured, and responsible enough. Here's how it happened:
June 18, 2012.. I woke up with an excitement in my heart because I knew that by the end of the day, he's going to be officially mine. I had my regular classes and lunch with friends.. But after that, things were different. I went to Sm Manila to buy something for him. I have already decided that I will buy him a bracelet from Silverworks (Just like what he gave me during the overnight after my debut). Luckily and Priase almighty God, I found it. Too bad kasi wala na tung katulad ng akin pero ayos lang. I found a better bracelet for him. Just like mine, but plain. Para mas panglalaki. And so, I bought it. I also bought a box so I could keep it safe and secured. I happily went back to taft and start preparing myself.. emotionally. Yeah, I was just in my school long sleeves and pajamas. Before 5pm, Jam and Kim got out of the room so that we could have privacy.
At ayan na siya. He called me pa bago siya pumasok. The hell. HAHA. Everthing went normal. We just talk about how each other's day went and so on. Tapos nung nagyaya na siya kumain, I told him, "Ay wait! May bibigay pala ako sayo! Nakita ko lang kanina eh feeling ko bagay sayo" (Patay malisya pa). He was the one who opened the box but I was the one who got the bracelet inside and nagsoot sakanya. "Ming, sinasagot na kita. Tayo na." with a smile while looking at him. Alam mo sabi niya? "Weh? Di nga ming? Omo~" At ayun, omo lang siya ng omo. (Omo = Short term for ohmygod).
I laughed because I was really happy, truly truly happy. I hugged him tight.. I was almost teary-eyed because finally, after a year and few months, he's mine. ❤ OFFICIALLY MINE. I don't need to hide my true-est feelings, to worry or to ask myself random questions anymore. He's mine, that means we are now capable of much bigger and deeper things about our relationship. Yun lang yung tanging magbabago samin. I promise naman na hindi ako magbabago sa mga tao, lalong lalo na sa mga kaibigan ko just because I had a boyfriend. I will still be ME. The Jan whom everyone knew.
There, I guess from yesterday's event, it will now be easier for the two of us. I'm happy because many are happy for us.. especially my most beloved family and friends. Thank You God for making everything worth waiting for. Thank You for giving us the patience and didn't let anyone or anything fall us apart. Thank You for this one genuine love I have found in him, Nigel Descalzo.
The prologue is finished, now let's move on to the first chapter of our love story. ❤
At last! Him and I are official! I'm so happy because many were happy for us. I could say that we have build a good foundation before we reach at this point. He actually waited for me for a year and almost 6 months (5 months and 18 days to be exact). I know it wasn't hard for him to wait because i also have showed him what I truly feel towards him, and it was all positive.
Yesterday, nagdecide na akong sagutin siya. It was actually planned last week pa. I know that 18 would be a great number for our relationship, my mom said so too. She said that in our number, which is 18, I will be the one who would make the relationship go further because of my patience and attitude. Of course, I don't want to let my mother down and will try to prove that this relationship will last with me, being matured, and responsible enough. Here's how it happened:
June 18, 2012.. I woke up with an excitement in my heart because I knew that by the end of the day, he's going to be officially mine. I had my regular classes and lunch with friends.. But after that, things were different. I went to Sm Manila to buy something for him. I have already decided that I will buy him a bracelet from Silverworks (Just like what he gave me during the overnight after my debut). Luckily and Priase almighty God, I found it. Too bad kasi wala na tung katulad ng akin pero ayos lang. I found a better bracelet for him. Just like mine, but plain. Para mas panglalaki. And so, I bought it. I also bought a box so I could keep it safe and secured. I happily went back to taft and start preparing myself.. emotionally. Yeah, I was just in my school long sleeves and pajamas. Before 5pm, Jam and Kim got out of the room so that we could have privacy.
At ayan na siya. He called me pa bago siya pumasok. The hell. HAHA. Everthing went normal. We just talk about how each other's day went and so on. Tapos nung nagyaya na siya kumain, I told him, "Ay wait! May bibigay pala ako sayo! Nakita ko lang kanina eh feeling ko bagay sayo" (Patay malisya pa). He was the one who opened the box but I was the one who got the bracelet inside and nagsoot sakanya. "Ming, sinasagot na kita. Tayo na." with a smile while looking at him. Alam mo sabi niya? "Weh? Di nga ming? Omo~" At ayun, omo lang siya ng omo. (Omo = Short term for ohmygod).
I laughed because I was really happy, truly truly happy. I hugged him tight.. I was almost teary-eyed because finally, after a year and few months, he's mine. ❤ OFFICIALLY MINE. I don't need to hide my true-est feelings, to worry or to ask myself random questions anymore. He's mine, that means we are now capable of much bigger and deeper things about our relationship. Yun lang yung tanging magbabago samin. I promise naman na hindi ako magbabago sa mga tao, lalong lalo na sa mga kaibigan ko just because I had a boyfriend. I will still be ME. The Jan whom everyone knew.
There, I guess from yesterday's event, it will now be easier for the two of us. I'm happy because many are happy for us.. especially my most beloved family and friends. Thank You God for making everything worth waiting for. Thank You for giving us the patience and didn't let anyone or anything fall us apart. Thank You for this one genuine love I have found in him, Nigel Descalzo.
The prologue is finished, now let's move on to the first chapter of our love story. ❤
Sunday, June 17, 2012
Last Day
Today will be the last day I'm single. It's been a very very long time. I've been single since the day I was born. Of course, I can't have a boyfriend at a young age so that doesn't count. HAHA.
I just wonder what it feels like to have a boyfriend. Well at one way or another, I think I already knew the feeling. He's been with me since the day we went along well. Kung hindi ako nagkakamali, first day palang yun. In other words, he's been with me since the day I met him. He's there whenever I needed him, negative man yan o positive. I just can't compare him with anyone else. He's different, he has something special within him. He's.. my beloved one.
I just hope everything would turn out great! Magaway man kami, I hope maging lesson lang yun palagi for us. I want to be matured, God. Matured enough so that out relationship will last.
I want to be the girl who would be there for him and push him towards his dreams. I WANT TO BE THAT GIRL.
Last day na to, I hope wala masyadong magbabago at maging totoo lang kami sa isa't isa. :)
I just wonder what it feels like to have a boyfriend. Well at one way or another, I think I already knew the feeling. He's been with me since the day we went along well. Kung hindi ako nagkakamali, first day palang yun. In other words, he's been with me since the day I met him. He's there whenever I needed him, negative man yan o positive. I just can't compare him with anyone else. He's different, he has something special within him. He's.. my beloved one.
I just hope everything would turn out great! Magaway man kami, I hope maging lesson lang yun palagi for us. I want to be matured, God. Matured enough so that out relationship will last.
I want to be the girl who would be there for him and push him towards his dreams. I WANT TO BE THAT GIRL.
Last day na to, I hope wala masyadong magbabago at maging totoo lang kami sa isa't isa. :)
Saturday, June 16, 2012
He got pissed.
Today, he got pissed on me. I really say the things I want without thinking first. Like what mommy said, attitude ko talaga yun. As we were laying under our fan, we cuddled up and we suddenly talked about those "things". I was beginning to be carried away by my emotions and said "Lahat naman ng lalaki, pare-pareho pagdating sa bagay na yun." Worst part? I was saying it like I really mean it (Well, I actually do.) He tried to convince me that not every guy, especially him I suppose, is like what I've told him. I i just blah him out, the main reason why he got pissed. Maybe, what he's trying to say is true.. Eto lang akong nag-inarte at pinanindigan yung sinabi ko sakanya.
Of couse, he turned around and didn't talk to me for a while. I was acting strong but I just can't stay mad at him.. Or anything like what is happening that time. =__=. "Oh, please.. Look at me" I said to myself. But there were no signs. So I lessen my pride and talked to him. Yeah, he's pissed. Sobrang nagguilty tuloy ako sa sinabi ko. Lalo na pinagdiinan ko pa na ganon talaga lahat ng lalaki. Well, you can't blame me. Whenever I stalk his profiles, hindi pwedeng walang ganong type of subscription meron sya. Sometimes, he tends to talk dirty pa. Haay. Natturn-off kasi ako sa lalaki pag ganon, sa totoo lang. Then I told him "May pinaghugutan siguro kaya ko nasabi yun PERO HINDI KO ALAM KUNG SAAN." What the hell Jan, it's so clear kung saan galing. Maybe, ayoko nalang kasi ng gulo kaya di ko na sinabi sakanya at nagsorry nalang ako.
Good thing about him is that, he can't stay mad or pissed on me. He actually said he's sorry too. Hindi rin daw niya alam kung bakit siya nainis agad. Well I can answer that, big boy. Maybe because.. Hindi ka nga talaga isa sakanila. You're one of the guys who always mean what they say kaya nasaktan ka sa sinabi ko. Thank you. Thank you for always making me feel important. ❤
Natapos naman yun ng okay. I mean, walang samaan ng loob. Ganon lang naman kami magtampuhan nun, hindi masyadong pinapalaki kasi wala namang mararating na maganda. :).
THANK YOU FOR THIS DAY GOD. I was happy. :)
Of couse, he turned around and didn't talk to me for a while. I was acting strong but I just can't stay mad at him.. Or anything like what is happening that time. =__=. "Oh, please.. Look at me" I said to myself. But there were no signs. So I lessen my pride and talked to him. Yeah, he's pissed. Sobrang nagguilty tuloy ako sa sinabi ko. Lalo na pinagdiinan ko pa na ganon talaga lahat ng lalaki. Well, you can't blame me. Whenever I stalk his profiles, hindi pwedeng walang ganong type of subscription meron sya. Sometimes, he tends to talk dirty pa. Haay. Natturn-off kasi ako sa lalaki pag ganon, sa totoo lang. Then I told him "May pinaghugutan siguro kaya ko nasabi yun PERO HINDI KO ALAM KUNG SAAN." What the hell Jan, it's so clear kung saan galing. Maybe, ayoko nalang kasi ng gulo kaya di ko na sinabi sakanya at nagsorry nalang ako.
Good thing about him is that, he can't stay mad or pissed on me. He actually said he's sorry too. Hindi rin daw niya alam kung bakit siya nainis agad. Well I can answer that, big boy. Maybe because.. Hindi ka nga talaga isa sakanila. You're one of the guys who always mean what they say kaya nasaktan ka sa sinabi ko. Thank you. Thank you for always making me feel important. ❤
Natapos naman yun ng okay. I mean, walang samaan ng loob. Ganon lang naman kami magtampuhan nun, hindi masyadong pinapalaki kasi wala namang mararating na maganda. :).
THANK YOU FOR THIS DAY GOD. I was happy. :)
Saturday, June 2, 2012
Nothing more, nothing less.
Meron akong problema ngayon. Well, hindi naman problema talaga pero palagi ko sya naiisip these days. This guy named ____ likes me a lot. Well, that's what they say. Nakikita ko naman din talaga yun. Gusto niya ako pero may iba na akong gusto. I don't know kung bakit ako ganto. Bakit ganto ako may pake sakanya. Maybe because kasama siya sa group of friends namin? Maybe nga.. Kaya hindi ko siya kaya basta bastang saktan. He had done a lot of good things to me already. Sobrang bait at caring niyang tao.
Ok, It all started with a friend of mine telling me na nagtatampo siya. Hindi ko raw kasi siya kinukwentuhan. So nagtaka ako akala ko kung ano yun. Yun pala, yung about nga kay ______. Sobrang nagulat ako na nalaman niya na nag "loveyou" ako sakanya. Well, hindi naman nagulat dahil nalaman niya talaga. Nagulat lang ako sa fact na binibig deal pa pala yun. Eh pati naman kina Ino at Ola, sinasabi ko yun. Sa mga guy friends ko. Pero eto ang problema ko, SARILI KO LANG INIISIP KO. I didn't even think twice to say those words to the guy who has a crush on me like forever. It just shows that I really don't think about him and his feelings for me. SOBRANG TANGA KO AT GINAWA KO YUN NANG DI NAG-IISIP. Syempre what do you expect na gagawin niya? He made a big deal out of it and start telling my closest friends and other people. Ang lalabas, may gusto na rin ako sakanya.. which is not true.
Okay, aaminin ko. Sa mga ginagawa niya, nafflatettered ako. He's a guy with a lot of surprises kasi kaya I really appreciate the things he does. Pero hanggang dun lang yun. All I can give in return is my gratitude, nothing else, nothing more than that. In some ways, naaawa ako sakanya. Kasi kahit anong gawin niya, he could never take me away from the one I love. Now here's the thing:
I don't know what to do. Maybe I have options.. but I don't know what to choose and how to handle it.
This friend of mine said "Hayaan mo nalang. Alam naman niya na wala na talaga kahit anong gawin niya." Nung nalaman ko to, naisip ko "oo nga naman." Pwede ko siyang hayaan kasi kung dun siya sumasaya eh, gratitude nalang ibabalik ko sakanya. Pero this another friend of mine said "Straighten things out." Kausapin ko raw, deretsuhin na na wala talaga. Pwede rin. Para matagil na laat ng to. Para wala nang maisip mga tao tsaka siya mismo. Pero I know by that, magkakabad record kami bilang mag kaibigan. Those two options have a very good point.. oo. Pero hindi ko alam kung ano yung tamang gawin. Kung ako naman ang tatanungin eto ang tingin ko.
I think I just to understand him at hayaan lang siya gawin ang gusto niyang gawin. I will always be nice to him naman, hindi yung tipong babaliwalain ko lang lahat ng ginagawa niya. PERO I still need to at least make him feel that.. friends nalang talaga kami. I need him to genuinely accept that fact and move on. Since friends naman kami ngayon, WE CAN ALWAYS STAY THAT WAY. I will even support him in everything he will do especially when it comes to his love life. Willing naman ako dun. Just like to my other friends. So in conclusion.. Hahayaan ko siya because I know he knows what he's doing but still try to remind him that I already have my own love. Syempre kahit alam na niya yun, he still needs to see proofs that I'm already happy with someone else. Alam ko namang matured enough siya para tanggapin yun.
Hey you, I just want to thank you for everything. I appreciate every single thing of the things you show me, but friends is friends.. Nothing more, nothing less. >:D<.
Ok, It all started with a friend of mine telling me na nagtatampo siya. Hindi ko raw kasi siya kinukwentuhan. So nagtaka ako akala ko kung ano yun. Yun pala, yung about nga kay ______. Sobrang nagulat ako na nalaman niya na nag "loveyou" ako sakanya. Well, hindi naman nagulat dahil nalaman niya talaga. Nagulat lang ako sa fact na binibig deal pa pala yun. Eh pati naman kina Ino at Ola, sinasabi ko yun. Sa mga guy friends ko. Pero eto ang problema ko, SARILI KO LANG INIISIP KO. I didn't even think twice to say those words to the guy who has a crush on me like forever. It just shows that I really don't think about him and his feelings for me. SOBRANG TANGA KO AT GINAWA KO YUN NANG DI NAG-IISIP. Syempre what do you expect na gagawin niya? He made a big deal out of it and start telling my closest friends and other people. Ang lalabas, may gusto na rin ako sakanya.. which is not true.
Okay, aaminin ko. Sa mga ginagawa niya, nafflatettered ako. He's a guy with a lot of surprises kasi kaya I really appreciate the things he does. Pero hanggang dun lang yun. All I can give in return is my gratitude, nothing else, nothing more than that. In some ways, naaawa ako sakanya. Kasi kahit anong gawin niya, he could never take me away from the one I love. Now here's the thing:
I don't know what to do. Maybe I have options.. but I don't know what to choose and how to handle it.
This friend of mine said "Hayaan mo nalang. Alam naman niya na wala na talaga kahit anong gawin niya." Nung nalaman ko to, naisip ko "oo nga naman." Pwede ko siyang hayaan kasi kung dun siya sumasaya eh, gratitude nalang ibabalik ko sakanya. Pero this another friend of mine said "Straighten things out." Kausapin ko raw, deretsuhin na na wala talaga. Pwede rin. Para matagil na laat ng to. Para wala nang maisip mga tao tsaka siya mismo. Pero I know by that, magkakabad record kami bilang mag kaibigan. Those two options have a very good point.. oo. Pero hindi ko alam kung ano yung tamang gawin. Kung ako naman ang tatanungin eto ang tingin ko.
I think I just to understand him at hayaan lang siya gawin ang gusto niyang gawin. I will always be nice to him naman, hindi yung tipong babaliwalain ko lang lahat ng ginagawa niya. PERO I still need to at least make him feel that.. friends nalang talaga kami. I need him to genuinely accept that fact and move on. Since friends naman kami ngayon, WE CAN ALWAYS STAY THAT WAY. I will even support him in everything he will do especially when it comes to his love life. Willing naman ako dun. Just like to my other friends. So in conclusion.. Hahayaan ko siya because I know he knows what he's doing but still try to remind him that I already have my own love. Syempre kahit alam na niya yun, he still needs to see proofs that I'm already happy with someone else. Alam ko namang matured enough siya para tanggapin yun.
Hey you, I just want to thank you for everything. I appreciate every single thing of the things you show me, but friends is friends.. Nothing more, nothing less. >:D<.
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