Your tears changed everything.

Last night, we had so many misunderstandings. I talked to him over the phone to deal with it. Napa-open kasi ako sakanya ng wala sa oras. I opened up that after all these days, I still feel that "Nigel doesn't love me anymore". Yes, I still do and it hurts me so bad. I actually cried in the bathroom hardcore before opening things to him again.

While we're on the phone, I simply couldn't fight back my tears anymore.. I cried and opened up. This is surely one of the most horrifying moments of my life because I didn't know how things would end up between us. Are we going to break up? Are we going to have a cool-off? Are we going to love each other more after this? I don't know. All I know is I wanted him to know these negative thoughts of mine though it may seem childish. Then I told him "Oh, how about you? Please open up and tell me everything you want to say. I can't always be the one talking here". And he did..

Those words from his voice made me realize that I was being foolish all this time.. Sinabi niya sakin na mahal daw niya ako and nothing would ever change that. He has plans for the future already and I'm in it, sabi niya. Yes, it's still possible that all of these are still bullshit but no, one thing showed that it was not.. He was crying. His voice was shaking. His trembling voice as he speaks became an eye-opener to me. I suddenly remembered the saying that when a guy cries for you, he really loves you. I felt pure sadness and sincerity in his voice.

After the long talk, I decided to throw away my negative feelings from now on. He's my boyfriend and I should believe in him. Tama na, masyado na niyang naprove sakin na mahal na mahal nga niya ako. He cried and made me feel that he was hurting even more kaysa sakin. Sorry if we had to do this first before I feel better, ming. But it worked. I feel a LOT better now. Those negative feelings are gone already.

Ittry ko talaga na hindi na maging TH sakanya. I will not expect na rin masyado kasi hindi nagiging maganda yun sa relationship namin. I will just appreciate kung anong meron kami ngayon. For as long as alam kong ginagawa naman niya yung best niya para samin, ok na ako dun. :)

Iloveyou ming! and Thank You God! ❤